I'll keep you locked in my head...

That filthy bastard did it again.   He tried to discount everything he said to delusions.

Feeling a bit High and Mighty? Well, yes, I`m calling it -- Bull Shit. You. god. damned. Fuckwit.

Some have asked what the story was. Well, here's the gist of it: Fell in love, was promised the world, changed the path of my life to meet his, then when I was hooked -- he cheated, I was stupid and forgave, then he did it again and again, I forgave, then he dumped me, I cried, then a couple of years later he came back around to tell me he'd grown and he strung me along for a couple of years long-distance, then he backed off when I finally agreed to take things seriously again.  

Almost 10 years of cat and mouse and I was fucking exhausted.  Now I'm stuck in a rut that I can't get out of, because I can't seem to make myself feel the euphoria of the first time we met.  I've been desperately seeking that feeling, that confidence in myself, and I just can't seem to grab on to it. 

I'd like to put things on rewind and start back 14 years ago, but now I just feel like a fool. That's it. A fucking fool.