and now work comes crashing down. So much to think about. My approach at detaching emotion from the office has missed a couple of times. I have misdirected and funneled my missing passion in my love life into a passion for work and it has combined into an inferno. Now it holds a force that cannot be bottled up.
Who have I become?
I'm that guy on the bus next to you, nervously looking around at the other passengers, trying to get a look into everyone's eyes to ensure that I'm not missing out on something behind one pair of them. I look down at my smartphone and read my email, play a game, and check out the missed connections online -- maybe someone's missing me. I sling my bag over my shoulder, adjust my iPod to something a bit more more driving, and then turn my way off of the bus and walk over to my building.
Just another day.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Monday, October 19, 2009
I've this crazy old notion that calls me sometimes...
These posts, each one part of the soundtrack of my life. As I post, I place each one into a special mix on my iPod as they each become anthems and odes to certain points in my life.
Just today, I thought of this haunting melody as I rode around through someone else's town. I looked out the window on 16th street and saw you. I managed a half-hearted smile. You smiled back and winked.
I turned to look back, but the driver had moved on. I keep saying that you'll come for me. You'll see me in a car or on a bus, or walking across the street and you will know me. The soundtrack pumping electronically through my ears will mix with yours like some subconscious soul mash-up.
Just today, I thought of this haunting melody as I rode around through someone else's town. I looked out the window on 16th street and saw you. I managed a half-hearted smile. You smiled back and winked.
I turned to look back, but the driver had moved on. I keep saying that you'll come for me. You'll see me in a car or on a bus, or walking across the street and you will know me. The soundtrack pumping electronically through my ears will mix with yours like some subconscious soul mash-up.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Can't you see that when I find you, I'll find me
I'm too old for excuses. What you did to both me and Derek was inconsiderate and inexcusable. It took me a while to convince myself that I'd not wasted the better part of a decade, and on nights like this, I realize that I'm still working on it.
Between my full-time white-collar job and full-time evening grad school, I try to drown my thoughts in the incessant drone of work and school. I keep thinking that when I'm done, I will emerge from the other end like the fairy-tale monster emerging a prince. Dream on, baby-doll.
Between my full-time white-collar job and full-time evening grad school, I try to drown my thoughts in the incessant drone of work and school. I keep thinking that when I'm done, I will emerge from the other end like the fairy-tale monster emerging a prince. Dream on, baby-doll.